I came into mamahood knowing far less than I thought I did, and in a rather abrupt way.
I met my two oldest at my wedding rehearsal. The night before we married. That’s another story for another day.
Then the Lord had us wait for a few years for the bio-babies. I cried every time I saw baby socks. Honestly. His plans are always best, though, and I’m so glad He’s sovereign!
Despite the fact that I was totally prepared for this mom gig, I have learned a few things along the way.
Maybe you’ll relate to my life lessons from motherhood?
Five Life Lessons from Motherhood
1) Schedules are Like the Moose–Elusive and Near-Mythical
I love hiking and the great outdoors. It’s my absolute favorite thing in life. My husband and I went to Yellowstone National Park a few weeks after our honeymoon. It was fabulous, and full of animals–bison, bears, elk, marmots, and eagles. We didn’t see any cougars or wolves that trip, and I was totally fine with that. But I really wanted to see a moose.
I was obsessed.
And my brand-new husband was so sweet, always on the lookout for a moose. The park rangers told us moose are really shy, and they only come out super early in the morning. So on our last day, we drove through the park at 4am.
Lo and behold, there was the moose!
I’d show you a picture of the moose, but it was black, and the sky was black, so… here’s a picture of us.
I’m a planner. I misplaced my Franklin Covey planner once, and I thought I was going to cry. I schedule everything, and I love my to-do list.
Here’s the thing about being a mom: I’m not really in charge of the schedule.
I mean, I know I’m the mom and all, but there’s always the spontaneous kid stuff that happens. Like projectile vomiting, handlebar-sternum accidents, that weird metal object that fell out of the sky at that pumpkin farm and led to four staples in the head for one very traumatized four-year-old…
And it’s not just accidents and illnesses. No, there are teachable moments, discipline, random book and game requests. Mom schedules are elusive. They’re there, but not really keepable. (I like to make my own words sometimes.)
James had something to say about plans. Here’s what he wrote:
Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit”— yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes. Instead you ought to say, “If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that.” As it is, you boast in your arrogance. All such boasting is evil. So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin. ~ James 4:13-17 (ESV)
Being a mom has helped me learn that people are more important than plans. Sometimes the right thing to do is to tend to the immediate needs of my kids. Momhood reminds me that God is sovereign, that this (whatever this is) isn’t a surprise to Him. I still make my to-do lists, but I hold them loosely.
After all, schedules are elusive–just like moose.
2) It’s Important to Be Specific
One of my boys loves maps. We went to a used bookstore when he was six, and he nagged me to buy him an old atlas. I kept saying no because it had the USSR in it (which existed when I was in high school–but that was a long time ago), and it just seemed like a poor use of a dollar. But I could see the poor little guy’s heart was completely set on that book of maps, and he wasn’t usually a beggar in stores, so I put back a book and bought the atlas.
He memorized it. In a week.
Thus began the vast collection of maps, globes, and atlases we now possess.
Anyway, he convinced his little brother that China was on the other side of the globe, and they could dig their way there. In my backyard flowerbed. Of course, they had adorable garden tools with little bugs on the handles because Target had them on sale one time and I had extra money that day. So, on a sunny summer day, I came out with snack plates (which really didn’t take that long to prepare, but kids are quick!) to find the two of them standing knee-deep in a hole in the middle of the flowerbed, a huge pile of dirt, uprooted plants, and bulbs piled on the lawn. After I collected myself (which was quite a feat for me), I explained that we never (ever) dig in the flower bed. I thought that was that.
The very next summer, my boys dug part-way to China. In the middle of the lawn. Not the flowerbed. Thinking back, I remembered that I had asked them not to dig in the flowerbed, but I’d said nothing about the lawn.
It took me until the next summer to establish a This-Is-Where-We-Dig-To-China spot in the yard. Because sometimes, I’m slow. Really slow.
Slowly (but surely) my kids have taught me to be really specific.
3) I’m Not Quite as Fabulous as I Thought
I’ve never had a soaring self-esteem, and there are a ton of things I’m not good at. Cooking, for example. But I felt like there were a number of things I wasn’t horrible at, and I thought I was totally likeable as a human being. Until I had kids.
Kids are so unbelievably honest. They also take a few decades to get a good hold on their feelings. Often their feelings are directed at their mama. Here’s the awesome part: Though my meal-making skills are seriously lacking, I don’t always remember important conversations, and I sometimes don’t say things the “right” way, my kids all love me. I’m their mama, and they’re my babies, and that’s that.
I’ve learned to lay aside any esteem I may or may not have had in myself.
My esteem is in Christ. I’m an adopted child of God, and that’s that too.
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4) Life Isn’t About Me
This was a big shock for me. Perhaps it was because I married as a bit of a heathen (I’d call myself a false convert), with absolutely no domestic skills (OK, I could clean, but I didn’t know how to schedule that in), and no real baseline for what a family should look like, but I really thought it was all about me. Wow, what a rude awakening having a family was.
I kind of had to get over myself.
Years into this deal, I still bump up against my innate selfishness. It’s ugly. But there’s nothing like realizing that if you don’t feed people they won’t eat to convince you that it’s really not all about what you want. At least, that’s kind of what did it for me. When I got saved and really started reading the Bible, I found the book of Philippians (what an awesome book!). Here’s what Paul has to say about my selfish heart:
So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. ~ Philippians 2:1-11 (ESV)
Well then. That pretty much settles it, doesn’t it?
My job is to be of service. I want to follow Jesus in all areas, and I want to bring glory to God.
5) There’s Nothing I’d Rather Be
I’d never (ever) choose another path. My children are so amazing, and I love them so very much.
Motherhood is hard. It involves vomit, blood, and strong wills. I worry about messing up, and about crushing little spirits. I feel the weight of responsibility, and being the mama has driven me to my knees many times in desperation. But motherhood is a tremendous gift, and I’m so grateful the Lord saw fit to allow me to be a mom.
My kids have enriched my life, and they’ve been a major part of God’s sanctifying work in my life.
I suspect you may feel the same way.
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I have 4 kids and have been a mom for 22 years. Best.job.ever!
I guess I’ll leave the comment right here! I was 19 when my first was born and 29 when my second was born. Two boys for me….wouldn’t change it for the world! Happy Mother’s Day!
I have two girls and I had my first one at 25 which for some reason had been my target age; I had always wanted to be married and have a child by 25 lol. They are 13 and 11 and I homeschool and love that I get to spend so much time with them; they truly are a blessing!
I became a mom in 2007 after realizing that I was the selfish one, not wanting to let God do what He would want in my life. I now have 2 beautiful kiddos and we’ve been homeschooling since forever 🙂
I became a mom at the age of 25 and my children are 8 and 4 now. They are my world and I am very blessed to be their mom!
I became a mom for the first time @ 17…
and for the fourth and final time @ 43!!!
It has been a learning journey to say the least 🙂
I became a mom at 26. I have two children who are 8 and 5.
I became a mom at 24 and have 3 children. We homeschool and it’s not easy, and it’s not supposed to be! But never give up because homeschooling is a privilege and a gift.
Four children – 23yog, 21yob, 17yog, 14yog. I had my first when I was 21.
I became a mom and 28 and we have 5 children
I was 28. I have four kids.
Loved all five of your points. I’m still learning to “find my esteem in Christ” and #4 was a real shock for me too. There’s absolutely no doubt that the Lord has used motherhood to refine and mold me like nothing else. I’m so thankful to be a mom to a sweet girl (8) and adventurous boy (6). Happy Mother’s Day, and thank you for the opportunity for a Kitchen Aid mixer!! 🙂
PS. I was 34 and 35 when I had my kiddos. 😉
I became mom to our six kiddos, five guys and one little sweet pea, when I was 23 yrs old!!
I was thirty when I had my own biological children, I have two, but I have two step-children. I can’t imagine being anything but a mom. It has been a tough road. I have been a single mom for almost ten years. I became disabled last year. I can’t be the mom I dreamed I would be, but I try to be the best mom I can be with God’s help. I have learned that I have to trust God to make up for my inadequacies and those of their father. God is good. I am blessed with how my children are turning out. Now I get to be a grandma too. I currently have three grandsons that are a joy!
My babies were born when I was 23 and 27. I hope and pray God will bless us with more.
I was 29 when I was blessed with my first child. I have two wonderful children:)
I was a very unready, unprepared, unexcited 25 year old when I became a mom. I had a second child just 2 years later. Now though, I realize motherhood has been one of God’s greatest blessings to me. Through it, He has showed me a glimpse of just how much He loves me, cares for me, and has patience with me.
My children – 1 girl, 2 boys
I was 31, 36, and 44 —
I forgot to mention – Homeschooled for almost 24 yrs now – although the 2nd child has dealt with autism, so we had to focus, and use public school helps.
29 – 2 boys, almost 4 & 1
30,I have a 4 year old, 2 year old, and 9 month old.
I was 19 when I first became a bio mom. However I was a great babysitter as early as 12 All the babies of our congregation enjoyed the love I had for kids.
After our own were in pre teens, we explored foster care. As many as 9 children have enjoyed the difference of Gods love in their lives, through the way we were able to model a different life style for them.
I totaly agree about the whole scheduling idea with kids. My husband and I before kids could pack up and be out of house for a trip to River Fishing in less than half hour. After kids, the husband finally learned to give us notice the day before. I agree life is suddenly theirs and not yours.
God Bless, Thank you for your blog
I have three lovely boys and I was 22 when I became a mother! 😀
I have three kids and one to arrive in late July. I’ve been a mother for nearly seven years. I agree with all five points. In addition, we are a military family and i have learned that our only source of joy is Jesus and His never ending grace. In the past seven years, we have endured three separations, five relocations and one being overseas. Life is not for the faint hearted but His grace is ALWAYS sufficient. Being a mom has been a journey which brings me to my knees daily knowing He is my rock!
I was 24 when my first was born and I am up to 3 boys.
“Life isn’t about me.”
I was 31 when I had my first daughter, followed by another daughter and a son. 🙂
Very insightful blog post!
I became a mom at 36 and have 2 kids. If I had started earlier, I would have love to have more, but now, at 43, it doesn’t loo like that will happen!
I was 18 when I had my first baby. I have 2 beautiful teenage girls now
I thought I had it all figured out…I’d have my last child by 30. Well thankfully…as the Lord showed me who really was in charge, I had our first at age 31 and our second at age 34.
I became a mom at age 22 and am now the mother of 9 children, ages 19-3.
I love your honesty. I am 53 and have two daughters….one 34 and one 12. God IS awesome and does give us the desires of our hearts. We prayed for the last one to happen for 14yrs. I am a much better and wiser Mom the second time around. I have learned so much about God’s grace and mercy in how He has parented me.
We homeschool and have from the time she was 3 1/2 and asked me to teach her to read. I truly enjoy being with her daily because I really like the young lady she is becoming. You’re right…it’s not all about you….Blessings sweet lady!
I was 24 when I became a mom, and I have 2 girls with another on the way
I became a mom on November 17th of 2013 when I took a pregnancy test and it was positive! My daughter was born on July 19, 2014 and my son was born on December 11, 2015. I have been so blessed with two wonderful children that have totally changed my life. They ground me and make me love life.
I was 25…although my child was stillborn, I believe that my son made me a mother at the time of his conception. I have two living children, and seven waiting for me in heaven.
Mom at 23. 4 children.
Age 35; 2 kids
I was 28, and have two children–who are 11 years apart!
We have 3 and one due the beginning of July. This was a wonderful post. I very much like: “Being a mom has helped me learn that people are more important than plans.”
I was 26 and I have 3 kiddos.
I had my one and only the day after I turned 19. She and I went through rough times. She has done well though, she is a nurse and has one son herself with no plans for more. One child was plenty for me, although I wanted more I couldnt and had to accept that.
I was 20 when I became a mother. We now have four children.
I had just turned 29 when I had my first and I have 2 kids. I love the part in this post about being specific with your kids. Very true!
I was 23, and now I have 4 kids.
I had my first child at 18 and my last two,twins, at 43. I have a total of 5 children. The twins have been homeschooled from kindergarten and will be entering high school in the fall. They want to continue homeschooling. I’m so blessed!
I have 3 kids & I became a mom when I was 20 🙂
I became a Mom at age 37. We have two sons and two daughters. Our boys are with the Lord and we look forward to all being together again in Heaven some day. It is truly comforting to this Mom’s heart to know they are with our dear Lord and Saviour! The girls bring us such joy; they are 12 and 7.
I was 29 years old the day my first son was born! I am a mama to two little boys, ages 6 & 3
Thank you for this giveaway!
Your blog is awesome and thank you for having this giveaway and contributing to the ultimate homemaker bundle.
I became a mom just two months shy of my 20th birthday. I have 7 children.
I had my first at 27 and now have 4 boys.
I became a mom at 24 and I have three children five years apart 2 boys 22&17 and a girl 12 what a blessing it has been.
3 boys, and one girl I couldn’t make it a day without:)
I was 22 and I have two children.
I was 25 when I became a mom and I have 2 beautiful kids.
I was 29 when I had my first child. Then had another at 34.
I have 2 boys…..that I adore.
Love that God has called to be a mom twice!
I am 62, have 3 children and 5 children. I beame a mom at 21
Great reminder that schedules and plans are so inconsequential when compared to the hearts of our kids.
I was a little stressed that I was turning 30 before becoming a mommy- my sweet girl decided to make her appearance early and I spent my 1st Mother’s Day in NICU with her. Now Mama to 6! Last year on Mother’s Day in the USA (next day where I was!) meeting my youngest as he joined our family. I never would have dreamed we would have a large family but what a blessing!
I have 3 children, and I first became a mom at age 26. My girls are 16 (almost 17), 14, and 10 (almost 11).
I was 29 and have 2 kids
I was 24 when my first was born and I have five kids.
I was 19 when I had my daughter and 6 years later my son came along. Love my family and am grateful to God for all He has blessed us with!
I got pregnant with my first 29. I had him at 30, life overturned by his many problems from birth and onward with autism and his multiple severe related problems. Lost two babies then conceived had my daughter at 34. Enjoy the blessings of God when and while you can.
I was 35 when I became a mom, and I have one beautiful 9-year-old boy.
I was 25 when I first became a mom. We have 3 boys and a baby due in June. They’ve all been surprises as to the gender!
We recently started homeschooling and I love this blog! So helpful!
I was 20 when I became a Mom and I have four children, three of which are now adult.
I was 24 when I became a Mom now almost 6 years later I have 3 and am loving it!
I was 25 when first became a mom. I have a six year old daughter and a three year old son. I love being a Mom! Happy Mother’s Day!!
I was barely 20 when my oldest was born, and I was SO ready and prepared. How could I not be when I knew everything? 😉 Now I have 3: 17, 13, and 10, and I know how little I know!
Such a wonderful blog post! I love/hate relationship with all the ways I’ve had to learn all the life lessons I’ve gained by becoming a mother, however I would never take back any of them. I love being a mother!
I feel like I relate to these thoughts and feelings you’ve described. I was 21 when I became a mom, and I now have 6 wonderfully and fearfully made! I love being a mama to them, it’s what I was made to do!
I have 7 kids and started at 21
I was 32 when my first child was born 🙂 and I have 2!
I have 4 children. I was 18 when I had my first and 35 when I had my last. I also have a brand new grand baby born at the end of February.
I was 31 when I became a mother and have two kids.
I have 4 children with one on the way. I became a mom at 24.
I was 22 when I became a mom and I have 3 kids 6.4.1
I didn’t think I wanted kids until I read an article about how soon the time comes when we can’t have them anymore. So I had one, and I’m so glad I did! He’s the apple of my eye 🙂
I was 30 when I became a mom and I have a boy and a girl.
After years of “infertility” I became a mom at the age of 43. He is my only child and a miracle. He is 13 now. He was worth the wait!
I was 23 when I first became a mom! We have 4 kids.
I was 40 when I came became a mama!!! I have 2 boys, 7 and 9.
I was 41 and so thankful to finally be married (at 40) and then to be blessed with a baby so soon. Isaac is our only child.
I became a mom at 21! And am the proud mom of 4 and grandmom of 2!
I was 25 when God fist blessed me with a child, a daughter, and 39 when He blessed me again with a son. Now she is 18 and he is 4, and I am old. Love your blog!
I have four children…oldest is nearly 21 and just came home from finishing her second year of college. Next is 17 and just finished high school…then my (nearly) 12 year old and (just turned) 9 year old. Our home is busy and sometimes loud, but we are blessed beyond measure!
I have four children, ages almost 10, 7 1/2, 2 1/2, and 8 months. And one in heaven due to early miscarriage. I was 25 when my oldest was born.
I have 4 kids and I’ve been a Mama for 7 years. <3
I was 20 when I had my first and only child. Been a mama for 16 yrs now!
Became a mom at 18 ! I have 7 children. Linda
We have 5 joyful gifts from God: 8,6,4, 1.75, and in utero. I have bee so convicted about not laying each day before the Lord as it says in Jas 4 and the other day God convicted me about not counting it all joy as it says in Jas 1. I praise God for the affirmation of what He’s been showing me. Motherhood is truly a gift and God definitely works out sanctification in me though it. Thanks for the post and the giveaway.